One of the things I've learned (and I learned it faster than normal because Chris told me), is that the drugs and therapies and diet changes and exercise and all that will HELP the meno symptoms, but not completely erase them.
That is no more apparent than on a day like today.
It began last night when I walked into a Bible study at 7:30, sat in a big rocking chair and started rocking. After 20 minutes went by I was struggling to stay awake. My mind started to wander. I fought to keep things from fogging over.
When I went to bed last night, I broke my Trazadone pill in half (that's an anti-depressant I take for sleep. I'll explain that later) and it didn't break evenly. "Should I take the big part or the small part tonight?" I thought. I decided on the small part because I was already so tired.
And so I woke at 3:30 a.m. And tossed and turned for an hour. Finally I went back to sleep when I moved to the guest room. For some reason, just a different bed will help me go back to sleep.
But I woke tired and sad and as the morning has gone on I've been listless, sad, the fatigue is almost nauseating. Absolutely no concentration. And a nagging headache that is asking me, "Should I become a migraine, or not?" Of course I'd rather it not.
I'm a little worried because I have two stories to write for the paper this week and they really should be done by end of day tomorrow. And I have follow-up interviews to conduct. But I can tell I will be spinning my wheels this afternoon. And so I'm gambling this afternoon. On the advice of one of my many nurturing friends, I'm going to go lay down in my dark room and rest. Try to read, maybe watch some mindless TV.
And hope that the bonk lasts a very short period of time so that I can hit the ground running tomorrow. I will go to Jazzercise tonight, no matter what. All that dancing and sweating always improves my outlook!
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